Now and then

I am just back to my room after a really long walk. But I guess this is the first time this semester when I went all alone. The last one was on the last day of last semester. I ventured out into the chilly winter night with a lot of unclear thoughts. My arrognace wanted to me to brave the cold, roam around without a jacket and I obliged.I started at about 8pm.

I was recounting all the incidents of the past few days including the Mumbai blasts. Three days of events which will change a lot henceforth, or maybe I’m wrong. It might just end up being another sad tale to report, read and blog about. It might be erased from the memory by just wearing a white t shirt or forwarding messages and e-mails or by lighting a few candles. 12 brainfucked bastards, close to 200 dead and many more injured leave back a lot of unanswered questions. Another Indo-Pak war? change in govt? POTA revoked?…….

I was around the library by then. Two hundred plus cycles. Reality hit me. Its the compre time, that time of the semester where a lot of courses suddenly seem interesting to a lot of people. It just reminded me of all the schemers around; I admit I’m still not completely out of the list. All the high CGPA plans, MS, MBA, Internship, Job Placements… wondering how much of the future has/is to be planned?

All the plans made in the high school, IIT, MS in MIT on a fellowship, Nobel Prize in Physics are all now out of the equation. Things/circumstances change too quickly or maybe its me who is changing. Back then, two years, every exam -stimulation tests, Boards, SAT, JEE was preceded by intensive preparation, solving every possible question, clearing others doubts… Exams were an excuse not to watch movies, listen to music, chat for long hours on non-academic issues. But now it has changed. I have become the kind whom I disliked the most back then; People with no plans, no idea of what to do in the future and who are lazy. I am watching movies (5 over the last two days and counting) and discovering new music to keep myself away from disturbing others. However I have still managed to keep myself working on certain projects of CEL, to have fun and in hope of finding a purpose and learn from others.

I’m hungry already. Going out for Coffee.

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